Challenging Challenges

As in any group, quilt clubs/guilds contain cliques, jealousies, and other bad behaviors.  Just because we enjoy a creative hobby, doesn’t mean that we are all best buddies.  In general, I think that quilters are honest, trustworthy, generous, kind, and forthright people.  I truly enjoy the companionship and value my time spent with a diverse group of people.

I am going to relay an unpleasant story of a series of events that happened in my quilt group.  I may tick off some people, and I may indeed foster bad feelings – something that I’m preaching against.  This story contains a little bit of revenge; I’m human enough to admit that I find that slightly enjoyable, but my main reason in regaling you with this tale is to preach a return to camaraderie.  There’s a resolution at the end of my story that restored my faith in my group and myself.

My quilt group has an annual challenge.  The guidelines change once in a while, but the basic premise is the same – accept the challenge, follow the rules, create a project and then they are judged by our peers.  Blind voting is the general judging versus a committee.

Just as in real life – not all our skill sets are the same and we should celebrate the diversity rather than resent those higher up.

“I’m going to do it until it’s not fun anymore”

Those are the words I told my hubby before Challenge 2011. 

After Challenge 2011 – I told him:  “It’s not fun anymore”.

History:

·         2008 – This was a fat quarter challenge.  The theme of the challenge was “reach for the stars”.  I made a double/queen sized quilt – original pattern - that is all stars.  If I remember correctly, I won “best use of theme” or something like that.

·         2009 – This was another fat quarter challenge.  This time I made a purse which was another original pattern.  The challenge fabric is was black fabric with all the little pieces/jewels/etc., on it.  I also made a wristlet and a key fob to out of my scraps!  I think I won two prize that year – people’s choice and something else.

·         2010 – This was yet another fat quarter challenge.  The challenge fabric was a black/red/grey wavy fabric.  I did a foundation pieced twin sized quilt.  Again, I won something – I think a first place.

I really cannot remember what level I won each year because that’s not the important part to me.  The challenge to myself is. 

The first three years of the challenge were led by one member of the group.  In the fourth year – Challenge 2011 – another woman took over.  I will be honest.  I found Woman #2 to be abrasive and had already had a couple run ins (minor) with her.   Also, in 2011, the premise of the challenge changed.  We were given two color crayons, and could use fabrics matching those and black and/or white fabric. 

The first problem that I had with the challenge was that Woman #2 selected the crayon combinations and kept track of what each person received.  Part of the success of the first three challenges was that it was totally blind – no one had any idea whose project was what until judging was done. 

The next problem that I had was that Woman #2 was openly hostile to me about entering the challenge:

“Don’t you think you should give other people a chance to win?”

That and similar catty things were said to me on several occasions. 

Fast forward.  The projects were done, they were set out on a table for judging and it was obvious to me from moment one that something was hinky.  I handed my project over to Woman #2 and she immediately made complaints.  Something was missing, wrong, did I attach the crayon bag?  I don’t remember the exact words, but the impression I remember is that she seemed to really not want me participating.  There were about 25 projects, and they were numbered 1 – 2 – 3, etc., until you got to mine which was “99”.  Hmmmm…. Stand out much?  And why was mine so separated?

I won nothing.  Four levels and I didn’t even place.  Yes, I was hurt, yes, my ego was bruised, but beyond that, it didn’t seem right.

In the days following, I heard a couple of rumors about my project being excluded from judging. Over the next year, I brooded about it, and discussed it with a couple close friends.  However, that was as far as I took anything. 

A few weeks ago, at a club meeting that I missed, the new challenge was announced and crayons (same challenge) were handed out.  After the meeting, one of the members asked me on Face Book if I was doing the challenge.  I thought that I had told her my suspicions so I responded publically by stating that after the issues of the previous year, I had no desire to.  Yes, I was passive aggressively posting on Face Book…. I’m no better than an angst filled teenager……

“Whisper, whisper”…..  Yes, grown women do that too…..

But, unlike those angst filled teenagers, when grown women are curious they actually speak up to each other.

Two weeks ago, we had a “mini-retreat” at a local church.  After my PA Face Book comment, and some discussion, one of my quilting comrades approached me.

“I don’t want to open a can of worms, but what do you mean by “issues of last year”?”

While I do not regard everyone in my quilting group as a BFF, the vast majority I do consider trustworthy and compassionate.  Of the group there in the church basement that day, I consider all to be good friends.

The story came out… all my suspicions and hard feelings.

I also heard that other people had heard other things about the judging over the last year.  And by other things, I mean that several different stories were in circulation:

·         I hadn’t finished the project

·         I had used more colors than I should have

·         I didn’t turn in the color crayons

Where did all these stories start?  Why so many different things being said?  Obviously something truly hinky went down with the judging.

I’m stopping here with my crabbing about it.  No more is necessary.

What happened next is the good part.

·         One of the group hugged me

·         Another of the group took someone aside and complained about Woman #2.  Apparently I’m not the only one she’s picked on

·         Someone told me that they believed me about my project being correct, done on time, etc.

·         I happened to have my quilting picture book with me, with a picture of the finished quilt, as well as the test piece, and I passed it around.  I got a lot of compliments.

I felt validated.  I felt cared for.  I felt a true part of the group. 

I can quilt/sew anywhere.  I can get a heck of a lot more done when I'm alone at home.  However, as I've said many times in this blog - quilting is social.  I go to classes and groups for socialization.  That day, in that church basement, surrounded by quilters and sewing machines and hundreds of yards of fabric - I felt a PART of something.

Enough sappy stuff, moving one....

The group member in charge of the crayon challenge this year stated empathically that this year will be completely fair.  She’s not keeping track of who has what, etc., etc., and gently pushed me to participate.

I quilt because I love color and fabric and the creation process.  I quilt for me.  I admire others’ quilts.  I even have jealousy over some of them.  I love to win because it’s a validation of ME and MY creativity – not because I beat someone.  That’s was Challenge 2011 and Woman #2 seemed to me – jealous of me, wanting other people to beat me even if done unfairly, etc.

Challenge 2012

Because of the outpouring of good vibes and camaraderie shown to me after telling the story, I AM going to do Challenge 2012.

Really, I’m going to add yet another project to my backlog…. *sigh*

Here is the text of the sheet that was handed out with the color crayons:

“We are going to do the Crayon Challenge again this year.  These crayon colors determine the fabric you pick for the challenge.  The fabric you pick has to read the color the crayons, but it does not have to be a solid color fabric.  For example:  If one of your colors is red, your fabric should read red, but could have a little bit of orange or pink.  Overall, the fabric should read the color the crayon.  Both crayon colors in your bag need to be incorporated in the project you make.  In addition to these two colors, you can, but do not have to, add Yellow in the project.  Again, these additions should read yellow overall.  This will be a fun challenge, a perfect time to work on color or to test a new design.  As usual you can determine what to make, it does not have to be a quilt; you could make a bag, a wall hanging or maybe a lap quilt.”

I’m not telling what my colors are; some of my group reads my blog.

However, I do need some ideas!  I have until May with this one.  I guess that means that somewhere in April I’m going to be frantically working….!!  (No, I’ll get it organized prior to that, really!).

Three colors….

Four was hard enough last year.  I take it truly seriously.  I’m an exacting type of person to begin with, and then add on rules?!  Last year was pink and purple for the focus colors – a particular shade of each – and black and white for fill.  I used ONLY black and white thread – for piecing and quilting – and white batting versus the natural color I usually use.

Yes, I carried it to an extreme.  

That’s me!!

If you read this, make a comment, or send me email.  Give me some ideas.  Should I do a traditional flat quilt?  Or should I make something 3D?  One of my friends is really into folded fabric flowers.  The thought of that appealed to me.

The colors are bright, and while they go together, it’s not a “soothing” combination.  They are very different from each other.  Yellow will work with the right project, but I’m also open to doing something with only two colors.

Ideas:

·         Flowers in a vase – 3D object

·         Something with RaNae Merril’s spiral designs… and original pattern by me, but using her spirals

·         Using several fabrics that “read” each one of the colors.  For example, color 1:  find a batik that reads that color, find a tone on tone calico type fabric that reads that color and find a solid that reads that color.  Would that be cheating?  Would it be confusing?

·         Doll clothing item

·         Table topper with appliqué – out of my comfort zone, but adding thread colors could give me more leeway

·         iPad case.  I have the pattern and the iPad.  However, not very creative, not an original pattern and how do I make it more “me”?

Rejected ideas:

·         Another foundation pieced piece (like in 2010), not enough possible variety with limited colors

·         A purse.  I just don’t want to make another purse.  I thought of the professional tote, but everyone’s made one or more of those and there’s not a lot of creativity at that point.

·         Pillow case and/or pillow… Too simple, not enough creativity.

·         Incorporating machine embroidery… yeah, like that wouldn’t give me away…..